can't you smell that smell

Living without TV sucks the high hog. For example, today i get my teeth cleaned and don't have time during the lunch freedom break for real food. So stop by Taco Smell for a quikie. Up in bright beautiful pics they're advertizing the Bacon Ranch Somthing and I'm a buyin. Fuck, it's got bacon, how can you go wrong? This thing is INCREDI, brothas and sistas. I mean, their bacon product tastes more like bacon than real bacon. Drizzle on some ranch dressing, add a couple chucks of other meats and 1 square inch of lettuce and you've got yourself the perfect meal. We shoulda fed it to our astronauts instead of that shitty Tang crap. We'd be dominating the galaxy by now and making Mars our bitch. If I had motherfucking TV, I would have been marketed to properly and I woulda seen this superfood weeks ago. Viva la Taco Bell.