Monday, November 29, 2010

what the FUCK?

My new overlord,...ooops, I mean new Jim Slanetz. He's the 4-eyes on the photographer's right. Dude is blind as a bat without the Oakley Cokebottles. He reminds me of Andy Dick from the movie called Employee of the Month. He and his wife, Karin are super cool so I couldn't be more proud to donate all my hard earned blood money to them each and every month through this long, cold winter of bitterness and despair. For every pound of dead cow flesh I whore at night affords me just one more day of snow shooshing. I shall bring the shoosh and wiggle each and every godforsavenly fucking cold day. Day in/day out. Until spring time...when the lifts have dried up and the rivers have thawed....and what's left of my fragile mind hath wandered off and found warmth in heavenly left point breaks somewhere in Peru, Nicaragua, or Mexico....there more shred....nevermore....or at least for this season.
Shaka! Awwwooooo!!!!

Saturday, November 27, 2010

trozo numero dos

pow day from Brown Recluse on Vimeo.

After a night of Oregon Fighting Ducks WIN and a Boise State Bronco LOSS, we woke up this morning to a glorious dump. 2 hearty inches already on the ground and more coming down heavy. We must've gotten 5-7 over the course of the day. More storms are lined up for the upcoming week. It looks like we're gearing up for an epic start to the winter. I've spent a couple days on the hill now and the list of body-part failures is staggering. I expect nothing less after stepping away from the body-rotting desk job. Today I spent a few hours on the hill and my thighs cramped, my fake hip seized up a little, the low back pinched at times, the shins ached, and the right knee MCL buckled. But it's such a good feeling of pain. Pain that means The Temple is getting stronger and stronger. Another couple weeks and my shit will all be re-aligned and powerful.

Sunday, November 21, 2010


Liz Clark - InnerViews from on Vimeo.

Being back in the mountains reminds me how rad and inspiring people are when they aren't trying to slit your throat for merging out of the fast lane. My years in California were kinda strange in that I got caught up in doing my own thing, most of the time alone. When I got done with each surf session and left the water, I found myself surrounded by people that I had very little in common with so I generally avoided everything. Better to be a hermit or go to the gym I guess. There was a handful of young, punk ass surfers/artists like Albers, Lovelace, Morgan, and Lightgnar that I was always stoked to run into or dropped by their place to say hi and see what they were working on. But besides them, I didn't find all that many folks that I wanted to hang out with. Liz Clark was one of the good ones, too. I worked with her when I first moved to Santa Barbara. She was 23ish and 95 lbs of chiseled confidence who spent all her free-time surfing or busting her ass fixing up some boat to sail around the world. She's what chicks ought to use as a role model instead of some fashion rag full of coked out pukers wearing clown makeup or one of those inbred Whoredashians. I used to ask Liz all kinds of stupid questions, not really letting it sink in that SHE WAS GOING TO SAIL AROUND THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD. Then one day day, in January if I remember correctly, off she went. She's still at it 5 years later. I can only imagine the wonderful and amazing shit she's witnessed while cruizin along the coast from Santa Barbara south to Equador out to the Galapagos Islands across the Pacific and is now regrouping in Tahiti. I'll be goddammed if that ain't the correct way to live.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Hundred-Grand-Dan Van

HGD got black-out drunk one night and tried to drive up north into the mountains. He got most of the way till he rolled his girl's rig with his arm danglin outside the window. It was a miracle that an off-duty Search and Rescue dude cruised by the scene a few minutes later cuz he wasn't far away from bleeding out. Dude had some huge medical bills. He was broke and broken, so he laid off the sauce for while. The chick didn't stick around neither. Then he won $100,000 in the Powerball Lottery. Just like that, he took his mulligan and could pay his debts to get back to even. He was finally able to hop back on the boozetrain and get weird. Around that time I remember him annoying the fuck outta me and some friends as I was about to get my Tackle-N-Tickle on with a chick in the local smokey dive bar, The Casino. He was relentless and came after me with a pool cue before I finally shoved him onto the pool table to calm him the fuck down. The bouncers then took over and I'm sure I went home by myself. We're still buddies to this day. About all he has to show from the big lottery WIN is a old bubble window Volkswagen Bus, a sluggish liver, and some permanent arm/shoulder/neck scarring.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

8,640 minutes to go

Back in the day, 3 weeks ago, I was fresh off the boat from an awesome surf trip. Then I packed shit up and drove back to 1997. It seems so long ago now that I've stepped back in time to start reliving the glory days. Lots of the same around here even though town has changed. It's been great reconnecting with old buddies. The transition's been so easy, it hasn't really sunk in that I'm 900 long-ass miles from surf. Besides butterin around the living room in my new Capita/Union setup, I haven't stood on a board in 3 whole weeks. No schooshing or slashing. No wiggling nor yelling. None of that. But all is well so far. Steady as she goes. We're down to 1 week till the mountain opens. That's just 7 days till I get to ride some chairlifts and wiggling around the mountain.

Thursday, November 11, 2010


$1699 later, I have my 2010-11 season pass.
So stoked to lighten my wallet so much.
Grooming and snow guns don't pay for themselves.
T-Minus 2 weeks till opening the latest.
2 weeks without any board sport, and all is well.
Stay on target, Gold Leader.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

There Will Be Snow

I went for a mellow hike through zee woods the other day. The New Recluse has been spending long days in the gymnasium getting The Temple ready for shred season. 7 years of laziness and injury will do that. So I needed to get an active rest day and went for a hike. It's been 65 degrees and gorgeous, but there's a ton of natural snow left up yonder after a big dump 2 weeks ago. I grabbed my cell phone and charged out into nature. The hike was cut short when I saw some giant animal tracks in the mud. Using my extensive mountain-man skills, I immediately accessed the situation. I've become soft in California, man. The thoughts racin through my mind were bear, mountain lion, and horrific death via the food chain. So turned around and went home to the TV. Snow scheduled starting tonight. Won't have to go on any stupid hikes anymore. Woot!

Thursday, November 4, 2010

First morning in Dildo Valley Idaho. My new butthut is above The Board Bin, the only real shred shop in a town full off skiers. It's way too nice for this dirtbag. That house across the street is Java, the coffee shop, my internetting source. I've slaved a couple nights at the Pioneer Saloon, selling meat. You can't beat our meat. Looks like I'll be more of a 40-year-old-waiter than a boozetender. But either way, FUCK IT, I've got no responsibility. Lots of old bros still lingering around. Some burning out, some living the dream. I still haven't built up any rage due to zero responsibility and hot mountain chicks everywhere. My coworkers have some hate, but I just stupidly laughed my ass off all night. So my winter is falling into place nicely. Just need to rebuild some anger.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

eat, surf, sleep

After flying for hours and pissing in nice toilets with flowers & fishtanks along the way...

I sweated nightly in Bingin underneath a fan.

Spent lots of down time eating Mei Goreng and staring at waves.

Clowns to the left of me...

Jokers to the right....

The price of freedom was $5 a day....

Goofyfooters heaven on the other side of this cave.

Sometimes you had to fight for the tube....

But there always seemed to be some tubes