Tuesday, August 31, 2010

i can see your shavasana

My flexibility sucks. The hammy's are a mess right now which leads to low back tighness which leads to a shitty foundation for roundhouse, push, or axe kicking. I keep trying to find more time for stretching. Just found some inspiration.

Rosa Acosta - Sexy Stretching from Gene Geter on Vimeo.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Surf, sleep, grow beard

The gameplan is coming together and is pretty much finalized. It goes a little sumpin like this:

-Move out of condo on September 30th.
-Very last day of Sex Waxing is no later than October 1.
-Pack up 3 surfboards, 2 leashes, 3 board shorts, iPod, and road porn.
-Store all my other shit and Subaru in friends barn.
-Fly to Bali October 2-27(if released from Sex Wax early, I fly out sooner and max out the sloth).
-Slash waves, surf balls off, and grow beard.
-Come back to Santa Barbara and trade out gear.
-Fire up the Subaru, load up snowboard, and all my winter shit.
-Drive fast as fuck towards my new home in Sun Valley Idaho on October 28th or 29th.
-Arrive in time to get shitfaced on Halloween, and practice my tackle and tickle technique.
-Wake up hungover as hell with sharpie penis drawings all over my face.
-Start work around November 1st.
-Shred much gnar and stop giving a fuck.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

I'm a quitter

Step 3...Resign and solidify departure date as September 30th. Done! It's not you, it's me. Thanks for all the wonderful years of employment, cool experiences, insight, and whatever. There's just too many things I've gotta do and being stuck at a desk is not one fo them. I need to go worldwide and get rad...or fail trying.

Lou's the man...

Friday, August 20, 2010

there will be blood

Almost 7 years of living in Santa Barbara are winding down.
It's more than double my usual time in one place.
Big fear of stagnation and not evolving.
More frightened of becoming boring.
I hate old people my age.
I hate golf.
Wanderlusting for something new.

Here's my prediction for my future...

Thursday, August 19, 2010

we're getting somewhere now

Step 2...Confirm high tipping, zero responsibility, night-time bartending gig and starting date. At no time during the winter will I have to work during the daytime unless I feel like it. Which will leave me approximately 150 days to slash the fuuuuck outta shit and break something important. Bald Mountain is the hill and it's good. Nearby is Jackson and Targhee, Pomerelle, and Bruce Willis' Soldier Mountain. It's like a working vacation. I love Santa Barbara, but as one of my dirtbag ski bum friends says, "it's full of people that I have nothing in common with". It'll be great to get back to a town full of poor people living the dream. Good people. My people.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

chasing the dragon

Step 1...Give notice that I will be moving out of condo at the end of September. It's been the first place in the last 3 years where the roommate is cool, the place is clean, we have cable TV, and it's big enough for most of my shit. It's a new place to me and I'm really bummed to be moving out so soon but the mid life crisis must take priority. And just like that, the vein opens wide as I slip the needle in.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010


As I get ready to make some life changes and possibly moving to a landlocked location, I decided to shape another board. I figure this is my best chance to shape somehting that actually works well. And it's just another thing to strap to the U-Haul. It would be really cool to make some legit turns on one of my own creations. I just might have done it this time. Ryan lent me his shaping room and I lent him some foam dust. The new Holy Grail is roughly 6'2" x 21 x 2 3/4. On my first 3 boards, I left the deck a little too think and the shit doesn't get on rail. It rides really flat, but fun enough. This time I thinned them shits out and should work better for leg snapping gouges. Now I just need to work on the tail, which I'm not totally stoked on right now. It's kind of a lumpy rounded square that I'm gonna slowly, passionately transition into a nice beautiful round with some 280 grit. Swell coming soon.

On an unrelated note, The Champ stopped by the office yesterday and I gave him pointers on how to surf Teahupoo. Good luck pal. Back in '05 he pulled off one of my favorite waves ever. Air drop, side slipped, lay back, grab rail deep pitted his way to the WIN.

Monday, August 16, 2010

que no, putas?

Why not own a restaurant in Mexican drug cartel country at Swine Flu Ground Zero with deadly sharks attacking from all angles? There's an epic right point break 40 minutes away, along with a handfull of otro excellente breaks even closer. One fun beach break is a 5 minute 4x4 along the beach. Just got the call today and spoke briefly with my partner. It's about a 2% chance of happening. More of this story later.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

The End

Under the friday night lights of nightvision...

The End from Brown Recluse on Vimeo.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Hall Of Rage

Yesterday was spent on the road. I was raging around like a turd swirling around the toilet bowl of LA County. Got to cruise through Malibu and check out this Russian Billionaire's 300 million dollar phallic symbol. Then Larry Ellison felt a little short when his little 200 foot sailboat pranced up to it. At first, I thought the ships were gonna screw, but that didn't happen. So I cruized over to Zuma Jay's and ran into my first inductee into The Brown Recluse Hall of Rage...his honorable Mayor of Malibu, Zuma Jay, Jefferson Wagner. This guy is great. No bullshit, grumpy, pyrotechnic expert, gun shootin, get things done mother fucker. He's good people.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010


This Stephen Slater guy is great. I dig his style. He gets his panties in a bunch, freaks out in a high security risk zone, rants profanities in a foreign language over a loud speaker, opens an emergency exit, plays on a slide, cracks a road soda, drives fast and takes lots of chances, and hooks up with a slutty topless tomboy wearing a fur vest. All this from the 9 times World Champ?

Korean news has foottage of Lynsey Lohan before, during, and after prison.

Monday, August 9, 2010

all day every day

Funny thing happened yesterday. I set the camera down and didn't realize it was recording life. Here's what goes down 5 feet behind me.

seeds from Brown Recluse on Vimeo.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Option B

The other flick I've been wanting to make is called FUCK YES, MOTHERFUCKERS. In this action packed saga, our hero once again spends October and November slashing Bali's waves and getting his mind mellowed. He never once get slammed into the razor sharp reefs and gets pitted so pitted constantly. Then, refreshed and ready to kick ass, he returns home to Santa Barbara and buys a local neighborhood bar/restaurant. His energy and futuristic ideas turn it into the hub of radness. Killer food and good times were had by all. And he's finally afforded the freedom to run his own life and spend his days draped in sweaty spandex, surfing, or shredding the gnar.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Sabbatical, no?

collarbone looks like a boomerang

I've always wanted to make a stupid little adventure style movie. The story begins with a handsome, muscular, wax salesman who has incredible hair and constantly smashes broads. He seemingly has it all...or does he???? After a long summer in California when the fucking sun never shines and the surf stays crappy and cold....he gets a vision. A wise future is told to him while enjoying one of Burger King's incredible new A-1 Steakhouse burgers in Clairemont. He's turning 40 and needs to flip this shit around a bit. So he clearly sees the correct path.....he is is supposed to quit the job asap and spend October & November surfing his balls off in Bali and get a little fucking Hindu inside the mind. When his visa runs out and he's had his fill of surf, he comes back to civilization, and puts all of his shit in his friends barn except for his cold weather gear. He could pack up his Subalezmobile with everything he needs for a winter of shred in Sun Valley, Idaho. That is where he spends 5 months slashing Mt Baldy by day and is the bartender to the stars every night. In between it's filled with romance, guns, fire, figuring out life, and a lottery win. Your dreams become reality while on...................................SABBATICAL!
Or something like that.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Monday, August 2, 2010


I'm man enough to admit that I watched some X-Gaymes last night. Now that I finally have cable TV, I'm able to flip between Jersey Whore, The Kardashinans Whore Around Miami, and Rupaul's Drag Whores. But last night, after an afternoon of battling headwinds and shitty drivers while on my bike, I grabbed some granola and watched the exciting world of skateboarding...sponsored by Red Bull. Let me tell you, I got them goosebumps when Tony Hawk starts blabbering on and on about how rad 14 year old Curren Caples is these days. If Tony Mother Fucking Hawk is calling you the future, you're the future. Get to work. The reason it's cool to me is because I know that kid and his parents, and they won't go all Sheckler on us. They're good peeps. The family that shreds together, stays together. He might end up with syphillis cuz he kinda has the Beiber-itis with the mini-broads. Good luck with that.