All kidding aside, I fucked up today. I actually swiped a brothas Nissan in downtown Whale's Vagina. The fucker stopped short in front of me on a green light. Stopped. Completely in the lane. In downtown San Diego. I give a courtesy What The Fuck Honks, then try to go around. Nope, not gonna happen today. The work van turn radius is only slightly better than the Earth's motherfucking orbit. As I'm barely brushing the paint off the left side of his bumper, I notice it's a carload that ain't happy with the howdy honk. Then THIS! Shiiiiiit! Some "sorry man, I fucked up", "we'll take care of this, no problem", "would you like some wax?", and I was able to leave with all my teeth. I haven't hit anything with a car in 20 years. The string is broken.
Oh, and earlier in the day, my windshield DESTROYED a pretty, little, yellow, birdy...right as I was entering BIRD ROCK. Hah! How ironic. Pretty awesome way to start the day.
No pics of any of this shiz cuz I was trying to leave the scene asap.