Friday, March 5, 2010

water rage

Last monday, I yelled at some stand up paddle dork. There were 3 of us surfing a little break. He kept paddling 5 feet on top of me every time. In cycling we call that move "the half wheel hell". In surfing we call it unacceptable. I'd move 5 feet further...and he'd paddle 5 feet more. After a couple times I said "dude, there's 3 fucking people out here...don't padle on top of me every fucking time". He of course didn't get it and said he had to be lined up with a certain spot each time. Yah fuck you buddy, so do the rest of us. Sometimes we don't get what we want. That's why I burned you, guy.

So it got me to thinking about the few times I've gotten worked up enough to yell at people while surfing. It's in the 5 or 6 range.

2006-Campus Point @ wave hoggin chick. Shitty day of surf,just needed one wave, but this chick kept paddling around everybody and wouldn't stop. People tell her to let a wave go by. Had to burn her.

2007-2009-Must've yelled at someone once or twice, but I can't remember particulars.

December 2009-Rincon @ asian, stink buggin guy-I didn't really yell, but I burned the fuck outta this dork and made him stew over it. I'd been sitting solo at the rivermouth for a while and wave appears. Dude walks up the beach, paddles out and immediately backpaddles me. But I'm determined. Super steep take off, grab rail right in front of him, tuck under lip and watch him flail about as he looses his leashless board. He paddles out later and says "you're (meaning me) not good enough to drop in on me (meaning him)". He's probably right. Calmly I say "oh, are you the guy that back paddled me?". He's can't think of an answer and mumbles loudly as he paddles off. His buddy comes over and immediately burns the fuck outta me a couple times. Buzzkill. I get it and leave.

January 2010-Rincon @ Daniel Graham-I didn't really yell. Instead I shoved his board after he back paddled me/fell off that wave/then snaked me on the very next wave. Suck it, pal.

February 2010-Mira Mar @ stupid stand up paddle lady-I was locked into a good wave for a long time and she tried to jump on it on the inside without looking. I shoved her board out the way. She yelled at me for not yelling at her. So I told her to "open your fucking eyes, retard".


  1. two chicks and an asian? sounds like road rage to me...

  2. Yah, I know, it seems like the ladies aren't very lady like to me.

  3. yea, pretty hardcore wave rage. try a couple of tall boys before each surf. it worked for me...and i lost 10lbs eating whatever i want!

  4. i thought we were homies dawg not very bro of u 2 take this out of da water. C u on tha sand.
    -Asian Guy

  5. Not very hardcore at all really. Actually all pretty mellow, maybe embellished a little. Haha Nigel. Nice try. But you did get me to thinking about calling out people, so I adjusted it a little. See you in da cage.

  6. good read.
    you should hear the bs that comes outta peoples mouths up here in WA. it's awesome.

    i should learn krav.