Friday, May 27, 2011

make it happen

Mission accomplished. Finally, in the 100 year anniversary of Hiram Bingham discovering it, I made the trip to Machu Picchu a reality. I've been wanting to wander around Machu Picchu since something like 5th grade when I wrote a masterpiece of a bookreport on Peru. To this day, they still talk about that report with a tear in their eye at St John Fisher Grade School in Portland Oregon. It's spoken about with the likes of Hemmingway, Fitzgerald, and Twain. Back then, us old fuckers didn't have Wikidildo or even cuntpooters. We spent all weekend before it was due in the libary plagarizing the shit outta books and encyclopdias. Scribbling the most obscure lines we could find in hopes that we didn't get caught. Fucking bookreports. Don't get me started on books that aren't made into movies that follow the story EXACTLY. YOu dickhead movie producers screwed me. I once wrote a bookreport on the movie "One Flew Over The Cookcoos Nest". If you've seen AND read each you understand how completely different they really are. They aren't even close. But I got a B+ with the following phrase in big red letters..."NICE BOOK REPORT...ON THE MOVIE". When I finally read the book years later, I knew what a jackass I was. So I'm wandering around Machu Picchu yesterday and it's even more amazing than I expected. I didn't see god or anything, and I ain't gonna grow dreads so I can unappoligetically kick a hacky sack all day, but it was one of the coolest things I've ever seen. I couldn't help to think about these little dudes just sat up there in the clouds, eating coca leaves around the campfire while jabbering away, grinding their teeth, and building shit with rocks. When they were too coked up to build shit, they climbed up incredibly tall shit to check out the sun even closer. Why wouldn't ya? And I wonder how much gold they had before the Spaniards came through and took their gold and gave them Christianity. It must've been gorgeous up there, and it still is even though it's just a ruin up in the hills. Well worth the visit, man.


  1. as per my comment four poasts ago, I DID THAT BOOK REPORT IN FOURTH GRADE HOLMZ!

    (haven't been to machu picchu though. you won that race.)

  2. Yah brotha, great book report writers think alike. I woulda plagarized your shit too.

  3. My youngest son talks constantly about wanting to go to Machu Picchu. You just did our family dream trip to Peru, surf and mountains, wow! Inspiring! I need to get the time and money to share this kind of trip with my loved ones.

  4. In Spanish, Tonto means "little man who like to turd burgler".

    When I reach to summit, I yelled "i'm combing over on top of the WOOOOOORRLD!"

    Forrest, let me tell you...make it happen while they're old enough to understand yet still young. It'll blow their/your mind and surely inspire the imagination. My expectations were so high and I WAY under-estimated how fucking rad it was. Bueno suerte.